ati "The Hero"
Owen Hart
Administrator/RWF Graphics Designer
Please write ati with all low letters.
Posts: 683 
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Post by ati "The Hero" on Jul 27, 2014 18:29:35 GMT
Banjo-Lady GaKazooie
Day 3: Treasure ___ Cove: (Let's play a bit of Cards Against Humanity here.)
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Story:
Not so much happened. No new characters. We could say that nothing happened, really.
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Soundtrack:
+Follows theme of level, still adds a little hillbilly feeling to it.
10/10
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Character Development:
Nothing happened, really.
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So... i guess 9.9/10.
BEARS!
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ati "The Hero"
Owen Hart
Administrator/RWF Graphics Designer
Please write ati with all low letters.
Posts: 683
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Post by ati "The Hero" on Jul 30, 2014 11:09:19 GMT
This is my review of Smackdown vs RAW 2008. Dashing! what? Cody Rhodes! He's not even in the game. Then... Marcus Caravan... Anyways, feedback about the review would be appreciated. So, let's start. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Story:Did you find one? Yes. That bad season mode rip off is the "story mode". (But Moron-man, are you saying that they didn't make a story mode? What will we do without a story mode? HOW WILL WE UNLOCK CHARACTERS WITHOUT A STORYMODE?!?!?!) First of all, call me a moron again and i'll cut off the tip of your fingers. Second of all, No. They did make a story mode, heck there is a story. It's just bad and repetetive. And don't get me started on GM mode... -Bad story... let me repeat that, BAD STORY -Even worse GM mode. +The trial in Heat, if you use a CAW somewhat helps it. Well, it does imo. 3/10
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Completionist Bonus:
VINCE FREAKING MCMAHON! IF I WANT TO PLAY AS VINCE MCMAHON, I DON'T. HE SUCKS IN THE RING!
... Jack, he's not even the Completionist bonus.... there's no such thing as Completionist bonus in this game... WHOOPTY-FREAKING-DO!-NO-MPLETIONIST BONUS!0/10
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Soundtrack:
Probably the best thing about the game. The good songs in that game...
You should count in the sound effects too... They didn't change them.... they are the same... even in 2K14...
So, ratings: +Good songs +Good sound effects 10/10
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Gameplay:
Meh. Great explanation, 11/10 IGN. *slowly claps*+Pretty good controls i guess. -Feels floaty... which is weird, because we're talking about a wresting game. 5/10
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Visuals:
On the PS2, 2008 and 2011 look the same... so yeah, i'll make it pass. +Good graphics i guess +Looks a bit better than the Xbox version (Mick Foley actually looks fat instead of a stickman in thug clothes.) 10/10
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And now:  : THE WHOLE GAME IS A GLITCH!
Thanks Marilyn... i guess... --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Conclusion:I give this game 5.6/10, and Jack will give it his Completionist rating. And i give this game the Completionist rating of: Try it!----------------------------------Completionist-O-Meter ------------------------------------- ˇ
Complete it! Play it! Try it! Rage it! Kick it! Burn it! Send it to JoWood!
^
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Cast:   |
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ati "The Hero"
Owen Hart
Administrator/RWF Graphics Designer
Please write ati with all low letters.
Posts: 683
|
Post by ati "The Hero" on Aug 20, 2014 20:16:37 GMT
Hey. How are you? How was the weekend? *Clears throat* Uhm... ati. Aren't you forgetting something? Like a review? Oh yeah. So, this will be the first part of a three part review. First, i will WE, will. Yeah whatever, sunshine. Anyways, we will review Saints Row The Turd You had to make that shitty joke didn't you? I don't even know why i keep you around... ...Maybe you keep me around because neither of us can leave each other. Let me remind you that I LIVE IN YOUR HEAD! . . . Anyways, then (if everything goes as planned) will post his review, then we will sum up the ratings we gave to Saints Row 3, and that will be our opinion. I would've never thought that a review is subjective and that it is based on one's opinion... Why so sarcastic, dear Jack? *Scratches head* Why am i a deer suddenly?--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Story: SPOILER ALERT!
With that out of the way, It's about you. The player's character, being the leader of the 3rd City Saints, and getting back into action after the "death" of the second most iconic figure of the game (Johnny Gat). 2nd Most iconic? Do you even grammar? And who's the first? Yes, no, and Professor Genki.
Back on track, Midway The guys who made Mortal Kombat, then went out of business and came back as Netherrealm? No. Midway through the game, the STAG (i forgot what STAG stands for. let's just say it's Super Terrorists Against Gangs.) takes over Steelport, and you have to... Nah. Just play the game. It's worth every penny.+The story's so good i played through it 5 times and i'm playing the 6th save -Cyrus Temple. He's a no-no. He's good for an enemy, but when he's in a group which's name you still forget after playing through 6 TIMES. Yes, that's a loss. 5/10 --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Completionist Bonus:+Tons of money, Zombie Johnny Gat, and a mystery. EVOLUTION IS A MYSTERY! A MYSTERY YOU'LL NEVER SEE!-Why the hell do they leave me with Zombie Gat if he's live? In 4 he's alive. And you can be sure that i want to know who was Zombie Gat, then. I also want to know what happened to Zimos in 4, but let's leave that to another review. 5/10 --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Soundtrack:+Good songs. They might get a bit repetitive, but that's why you can mute it. (There will be a fully re-wrote version of Power from Kanye West, sung by Jack in the end of the review.) 10/10 --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Gameplay:Pretty good gameplay actually. It's nothing to be ashamed of, but it's not that great either. It's just the way you like it. 10/10 --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------The Struggle/Difficulty:I give the game a plus point, because it lets you decide the difficulty when you want. Now, being the casual player i am, i played on casual. But i always have a chance to change the difficulty, so if i feel like.. it's your thing, Jack. Say it. Raising the roof. Thanks. So, if i feel like that, i can do it, and that's great. IT'S THE FIRST TIME IN ATI'S GAME REVIEWS' HISTORY, WE GIVE THIS SECTION AN:11/10 --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------And now:  :Surprisingly, i haven't found game breaking bugs. The ones i found were either patched up by the game itself, or was so funny that i didn't care.--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Conclusion:The game is good. There's no doubt. If you'd like to play a crazier, cheesier GTA, buy Saints Row. All of them. ...Okay, not all of them, but 2, 3, and 4. We give this game a rating of: 9.5/10 And the Completionist rating of: Complete It! ----------------------------------Completionist-O-Meter------------------------------------- ˇ Complete it! Play it! Try it! Rage it! Kick it! Burn it! Send it to JoWood! ^ --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Cast:   AND NOW: Powder by Kanye East (feat ati): Oh hey, hey, oh. Oh hey, hey, oh. Oh hey, hey oh. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. Heeey, heeey
I'm livin' on the 21st Mercury, For-getting something meaning to it. Livin' it better, than anybody you've ever seen do it. Screams from the neighbors, it got a pretty nice ring to it. I guess every super-man needs a teasing for it. No one, man, should have all that powder. The clock's tickin' counting MVP's hours. Stop tripping, tripping on the cowards. 21st Mercury-man The system's broken, the pub is closed, the workplace's open. We got nothin' to drink. Huh? We got nothin' to drink. With some darker women, and Connan O' Brian. In this cruel world we the ones chosen. So good night, you turd, i'll see you in the mornin'. Dude, i'll see you in the morning. This is way too much, i need a slip of Vodka. No one, man, should have all that powder. The clokc's tickin' counting MVP's hours. Stop trippin', tripping' on the cowards. Till then, I don't care, the world's mine! Drug? CIA? I didn't smoke it, officer. But tell Cortez that he can kiss my troll ass. More specifically, i will shove it down his throat-hole. I'm high? Looks like the pigs' got jokes. You short minded trolls thought you can roll. My fur says purr when he likes what he sees, and he ain't sayin' purr. My characteristics are being egotistic, majestic, and flawlessly eating fish-sticks. Cortez knows what's coming for him. I just needed time alone, with my own plant. Found treasures in the dirt, but couldn't open my vault. My child like creativity, purity, and honesty is honestly crowded by thugs. Reality is catching up with me, beating up my inner child who i fought for. With these beats i get, i need to take a break, take a slip of my Vodka, and suck being a 40 year old, drug and alcohol addict up, and fight for my future. No one, man, should have all that powder. The clock's tickin' counting MVP's hours. Stop tripping, tripping on the cowards, till then, i don't care. The world is mine! 21st Mercury-man Colin Powell, don't go, McGyver. Lost in translation with the whole station. They say i am the abomination of the Nirvana-station. Well, that's a way to start a conversation. At the end of the day i'm trippin' on this shit. I know well how ya'll feelin' this shit. I don't need to see your face, i got my own one. I ain't trippin all day because i want to. Just my dealer Cortez left me 6 packages before getting arrested. I should get rest, Ed. Oh, Hey oh. Oh, hey oh. Heey, heey. Now this'll be a beautiful death. I'm jumpin' out the window. I'm letting everything go. With jumping out the window. You got the powder. The powder of a power which can make you or break you. 21st Mercury-Man
Well... i promised a completely re-wrote song, not one that makes sense. I hope you liked the review, and feedback about it would be appreciated.
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SRI
Abdullah The Butcher
Administrator/RWF Creative/RWF Writer
Avatar and sig credit to BaneTheDestroyer
Posts: 408
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Post by SRI on Aug 21, 2014 10:20:49 GMT
Ha, nice review, ati. Pretty funny with the gimmicks.  Especially this part; |
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ati "The Hero"
Owen Hart
Administrator/RWF Graphics Designer
Please write ati with all low letters.
Posts: 683
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Post by ati "The Hero" on Aug 21, 2014 10:46:10 GMT
Ha, nice review, ati. Pretty funny with the gimmicks. Especially this part; Thanks. I try my best, at playing the crazy guy. How did you like the "song" in the end? I'm also trying to include more gaming/wrestling references as jokes. But, oh well, i only included that one because Midway games came to mind when i wrote midway. |
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ati "The Hero"
Owen Hart
Administrator/RWF Graphics Designer
Please write ati with all low letters.
Posts: 683
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Post by ati "The Hero" on Aug 21, 2014 16:09:05 GMT
Jack sent this and told me to post it. Said he found it somewhere.
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ati "The Hero"
Owen Hart
Administrator/RWF Graphics Designer
Please write ati with all low letters.
Posts: 683
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Post by ati "The Hero" on Aug 22, 2014 19:02:40 GMT
List of my games, i can review/reviews i've already done: (Note: If the game was already reviewed, the text will be colored with Red for the normal ati, Green for Jack Williams, and Pink for Marilyn. The colors will also indicate the percent of who did said review.)
BattleBlock Theather
Tekken Tag Tournament
Smackdown vs Raw 2011
Smackdown vs RAW 2008
Strider 2014
Hitman Absolution
Contra
Mirrors Edge
Gotham City Impostors
Super Mario Bros.
Super Street Fighter 4 Arcade Edition
Dust: An Elysian Tail
Sleeping Dogs
Game Dev Tycoon
Saints Row: The Third
The Walking Dead S1 E1 (Or i could review the whole season, season 2, or 400 days)
The Wolf Among Us S1 E1 (could review whole season.)
Lara Croft The Guardian of Light
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ati "The Hero"
Owen Hart
Administrator/RWF Graphics Designer
Please write ati with all low letters.
Posts: 683
|
Post by ati "The Hero" on Sept 6, 2014 9:06:28 GMT
Hey. This is my review.... Our review, mate. *Sigh* Jack, didn't you go somewhere with Marilyn? Why are you here anyways? Now you have your own body. Your reviews need salt, mate. I am that salt. Whatever. Anyways, this is our review of Super Street Fighter 4: Arcade Edition. Shinra Tensei! ...Wrong anime, Jack... ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Story:If you find one, please tell me what it is. All I could get out of the cutscenes is that everyone is going after an evil organization named S.I.N., and a robot thingy named Seth is it's leader or something like that. Shadaloo is brought up, but in a way, you don't care about. So.. you're saying that no fighting game has a story? I mean, the two fighting games you've reviewed so far, didn't really have a story. That's not anywhere near anything i was saying. I'm just pointing out facts, mate. Tell me here are the "facts" in your... wait, i'm arguing with myself. There's no way i'm going to admit that i'm wrong. But to answer your question, Jack. Mortal Kombat Nein has a story. A pretty bad one, but a story is still better than what SSF4AE has. And why's that? It's because SSF4AE's "story" is a puzzle. You need to play through the game with literally everyone to get something that's somewhat close to a story. +Pretty good cutscenes. They could tell a good story... -...If there would be such thing. 5/10---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Gameplay:The gameplay is pretty good. It's good for beginners and veterans too. I mean, there are moves "designed" for beginners, and there are other moves, "designed" for veterans. Or i'm just bad at the game. Probably the latter. You have your old moves... Hadoken = Quarter circle + punch ...and you have your new moves... Gouken's Shoryuken = Break your controller, or at least, that's what I did to do that move. ...The game has a fair difficulty, and runs fluidly. +Pretty good gameplay. Especially for a "dinosaur". +The "glitchy" combo system is still alive. 10/10---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------The Struggle:As i said above, the difficutly is pretty good. +Fair difficulty. It's not too hard, but it's not too easy either. 10/10(?) --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Completion Bonus:Do you want to do this, Jack? Sure. There's no such, bloody thing as a completionist bonus! That is if you don't count icons, nametags, and re-colorings of the characters' clothes, and the big number of one achievement a completionist bonus. I get that the game was made for beginners, but there should be some bloody thing for a completionist bonus! At least a plus character, like i don't know... Shin Akuma? Maybe?- No completionist bonus0/10-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Level Desgin:+Pretty good levels -Though i miss the castle stage Ryu had back in the day. 5/10-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Soundtrack:+I like the soundtrack. It has bad songs, but most of them are listenable. 10/10------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------And now:  I didn't find any glitches so far. If you find one, tell me. I'll tell ati to update the review.------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Conclusion:
SSF4AE is a pretty good game. If you liked the old ones, you sould give it a try. And that is why i give it the rating of: 6.8/10And the completionist rating of: Try it!----------------------------------Completionist-O-Meter-------------------------------------
ˇ Complete it! Play it! Try it! Rage it! Kick it! Burn it! Send it to JoWood! ^
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Cast:
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ati "The Hero"
Owen Hart
Administrator/RWF Graphics Designer
Please write ati with all low letters.
Posts: 683
|
Post by ati "The Hero" on Sept 26, 2014 20:12:29 GMT
Hey. This is the first episode of,  . Today, i will review Megaman X6. And with probably no Jack. (He's laying somewhere knocked out by his Vodka.) So, let's start, i guess. Wow, this is weird. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Story:Seriously? I. Don't. Know. I kind of know pieces, but that's all. So, from the pieces, this is what i gathered so fa; Same Megaman X story, but Zero is dead. You do the same, and Zero is dead. Also, did i mention that ZERO IS DEAD?!? How could you kill Zero, the better Megaman, off? ..But i guess this is just the 10000000th time he died, so he's close to tying Krillin. From that, i guess he'll be back. After the first boss, he did appear, but he was in X's dream? While X as awake? What? Ah, whatever. Moving on to the ratings. +The dead Zero appears -The dead Zero appears, and teases you with being dead -i could tell you the base of the story, and i skipped.. like.. 4 games 3/10-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Graphics:The graphics aren't that bad. It's still better than the PS1 games that went full polygon and looked like shit... +The graphics aren't bad. I would say that i expected more from a PS1 game, but most of the PS1 games were either looked like this, or looked worse, so i'll et it pass for now 9.9/10 (still could use some work, but it looks good.) -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Gameplay:Megaman. Got. Zero's. Saber. I mean, i'm glad that i can still use it, but it's a bit weird to have Megaman slashing his enemies with a lightsaber. Especially because he doesn't deserve it, but that's only my opinion... Anyways, the gamelpay isn't bad at all. It's like the other titles in the series... ..okay, not counting 7 and 8. For some reason everyone hates those... +Just like the other titles in the X and Zero series. It's good -May be boring for the ones who didn't like it, or wanted something new 5/10-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Soundtrack:I didn't hear music... -Again, i didn't hear music +But the sound effects are good 5/10-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- The Struggle:It's Megaman. It has it's Megaman difficulty level. It lived up to my expectations, so far. 10/10-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Uh... what? What are you doing there? ..You know... my own review show? You don't do shit without me, mate. You CAN'T do shit without me, mate. Actually, i just finished writing a review... Lemme read through it! *Jack reads through this* It's bad. No, it's horrible! This is boring, short, and saltless. Turns out, I AM the salt of your reviews. *sigh* Okay, could i just finish this and move on? Whatever, mate.So... Conclusion:I like the game so far, and that's why i give it a 7.5/10And the Completionist rating of: Play it!--------------------------------------------------Completionist-O-Meter-------------------------------------------------- ˇ Complete it! Play it! Try it! Rage it! Kick it! Burn it! Send it to JoWood! ^ -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- And before crap comes raining down on me, brother, this isn't my full review. There will be a full review after i finished the game. Cast:
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SRI
Abdullah The Butcher
Administrator/RWF Creative/RWF Writer
Avatar and sig credit to BaneTheDestroyer
Posts: 408
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Post by SRI on Sept 27, 2014 15:24:46 GMT
You do put a lot of work into this.  And it's fucking awesome! Ever wondered you could get more eyeballs to this work if you post it on the 2K Forum's as well? |
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ati "The Hero"
Owen Hart
Administrator/RWF Graphics Designer
Please write ati with all low letters.
Posts: 683
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Post by ati "The Hero" on Sept 27, 2014 16:27:27 GMT
You do put a lot of work into this. And it's fucking awesome! Ever wondered you could get more eyeballs to this work if you post it on the 2K Forum's as well? Actually, i post these on 2 forums now as well. The new FOS, and here. And i don't know if Zeo would let my reviews pass... EDIT: But i'll give i a try there. Actually, if i'll get banned, i will do what i want to do on the first place. I wanted to see how much time it takes me to get banned, lol. EDIT2: Okay, i tried. I can't post the thread. EDIT3: Now i did post it, but i had to delete the coding. Oh, how much do i love you, 2K forums... |
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SRI
Abdullah The Butcher
Administrator/RWF Creative/RWF Writer
Avatar and sig credit to BaneTheDestroyer
Posts: 408
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Post by SRI on Sept 27, 2014 17:32:48 GMT
Yeah, 2k Forum is pretty messed up.
A workaround is, you post a short message while creating the thread. After posting the thread, you can edit the post and add the original post with the codes. It works.
The issue is, if you post a thread with formatting in it, you get 404 errors. But fortunately, we don't get the 404 errors while editing the post. Which means, you can edit the post and include the codes and it will work.
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ati "The Hero"
Owen Hart
Administrator/RWF Graphics Designer
Please write ati with all low letters.
Posts: 683
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Post by ati "The Hero" on Oct 1, 2014 23:46:35 GMT
Hey, once again, this is  . *sigh* with Jack... 'Ey, mate...So, today i'm going to do something different, and review the beta of a game. Minecraft? No. That game will never come out of being beta. It's like an experiment that never ends. Anyways, i'm going to review something that, i'm sure, no one knows. That game is like a Super Smash Bros. fan game, made by a foreigner youtuber, . Just rolls of the tongue, doesn't it? Anyways, this game is still in development, but with every update, he gives the link to the viewers, so they can download the game, and if people doesn't like something, he'll take it out.. etc, etc. Why don't you just start the bloody review, mate?Okay, okay. The game is called "Mushroom Kingdom Showdown", and it's currently in 0.6 Beta. It's also a fighter. Duh.-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Story:Don't search for it, it's not there. There isn't any story as i know, and i follow this game, just to know if it's even worth playing, so... 0/10-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Gameplay:It has .. weird controls if you ask me. Maybe it's just me, but i haven't played a fighter that uses two buttons for attacks... ... Okay, the DS Guilty Gear games, but i don't even know if those are games... ...anyways, there are two difficulties, "Normal" and "Hard". I didn't play it on hard , because this show is about my first impressions and not about how i challenege myself. Anyways, Normal difficulty is okay. I'll try hard when it will be a full game. ...Assuming that it will even reach that...+It's alright, i guess -I found te use of only two buttons, or i guess i should say one because one is your normal attakc, and the other is your special, well, weird 5/10-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Visuals:It's alright. It uses sprites, and he does have the creators' names in the credits, so they're okay(?) +Again, not the worst i've seen -It could be better, but i don't know what i want from a fan game... 5/10-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Sounds:Turn. Them. Off. It's not that they are bad, it's that they're repetetive. +The sounds are okay... -...but also repetive as hell 5/10-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Roster:Okay, let me boot up the game, and see the base roster you get in this version: Mario, Luigi, Wario, Waluigi, Kamek, Dankey Kang, Bowser JR, Peach, E.Gadd, Yoshi, Bowser, Fawful, Wart, Koopa, Toad, and last but not least, the creator, . He was "requested by players" as he said it, but i don't kn ow if i believe him. Anyways, you have a boss, and unlockable characters too. The boss is, as i like to call him, Super Mecha Death Bowser, and the unlockables are: DR.Mario, Shadow Mario, and the king of piranha plants who's name i forgot. +I must admit, it's a pretty good roster -You can't unlock Super Mecha Death Bowser 5/10-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Conclusion:It'S a pretty good game, if you want to try it out, but as it is right now, it's not enough to keep people playing. And that's why i give this game a devastating 5.1/10And the Completionist bonus of: Try It!----------------------------------Completionist-O-Meter------------------------------------- ˇ Complete it! Play it! Try it! Rage it! Kick it! Burn it! Send it to JoWood! ^ -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Also, if you want to try it out yourself, i will include the link to download it below this text. www.mediafire.com/?xl1tdmn95x68xtp |
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ati "The Hero"
Owen Hart
Administrator/RWF Graphics Designer
Please write ati with all low letters.
Posts: 683
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Post by ati "The Hero" on Oct 6, 2014 20:00:01 GMT
Big Announcement!
Do You Even Hype, Bro?
I just wanted to hype up the next three reviews, and let you know, that i will have to do a lot of work on these. I'm not going to beat around the George W. Bush, i'll just let Jack say it;
So, the next three reviews will be written about these games, mate;
Dishonored: RATS! MIKE WHY DID YOU DO THIS?!?
Assassin's Creed: Brotherhood: Ezio's last adventure. (more on that later)
And last but not least, Assassin's Creed 3: I miss Ezio.
We hope that you will like these, and because of the long time gap that will happen between these reviews, we will write a "gaming diary", and we will post a mini review up to the point where we are at the moment. Well, if people will ask us to post these, because we don't want to bore people.
Anyways, between these reviews, "ati's First Thoughts" and the main game review show will air like normal.
Actually, a review of Forza 4 will air today, if i'm not mistaken.
Anyways, thanks for you patience, and we hope that you will like these upcoming reviews. Jack... before we stop, where did your Irish accent went? ...You do know that i have an accent module built into my robot body and i can change my accent any time i want, right?..Not really. Marilyn forgot to tell me. Anyways, this is all we had for now, and the Forza 4 review, is in the makings. Bye. Bye!(P.S.:We consider Brotherhood, Ezio's last adventure, because Revelations is more of a crossover between 1 and 2. But again, this is our personal opinion, and this is completely subjective. |
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ati "The Hero"
Owen Hart
Administrator/RWF Graphics Designer
Please write ati with all low letters.
Posts: 683
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Post by ati "The Hero" on Oct 6, 2014 21:04:23 GMT
When i say "Use?!" you say "No!" Use?! No!...Looks like we're not alone... Well, shit. Anyways, hey, this is our review of Forza Motorsport 4, or F4 as i call it. No goofy names, Jack? Just look at it's real name. It's goofy enough already.Alrighty, then. Let's start! -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Story:I didn't find one. I'm not saying that a racer should have a story... ...But all games excluding Tetris should have at least something that resembles as story. Why do you exclude Tetris?I have an answer, and a question for you too. My question is; How do you make a story about placing shapes to get points, and not look like a crazy drug addict? And my answer is; You can't. So, anyways, i made up a story that holds it's own so far. It's the following; You want to be the next Stig, but to do that, first you must go throught Top Gear's challenge, to be the greatest driver of them all. And to prove that you are worthy, you must win most, if not every race you enter, in the short time period of 20-60 years of racing. I'll give this section a.. hm... 1.5/10. What makes this "story" somewhat good, is the same thing that makes it bad. The lack of story. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Gameplay:It's not bad, mate.+ You can costumize your difficulty settings. Make it as easy, or difficult as you want.+ Pretty good AI.- The AI cheats. No one in race history can go the same route as it was programmed in the game. (shown by the arrows) It's just not fair.7/10-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Music:Just pretend that it's not there. -That's a line you don't want to hear when a player talks about your game. 0/10-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Level Design:... I don't know if i even want to talk about this...
They're the real race tracks. No original tracks. Which is good, because you could see the same track on the TV, but it's bad at thea same time. Mainly because i can't rate it.?.??/10-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Roster:They have lots of cars. I have my three favorite cars in the game. They rae my favorite cars in real life too. (Well, duh.) These three are; Nissan Skyline (Just choose one from the line. I'm not picky in this.), Audi R8 (Again, any version)/Le Mans Quattro (Same look, better car. Too bad that it's not it.), and last but not least, the Lamborghini Murciélago SV. And now you know something you never cared about! Anyways, i give the roster a good 8/10-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Graphics:It looks good. It's not the best i saw, by any means, but it looks prety good if you ask me. 6.7/10-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- And now:  :I didn't find any bugs.-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Conclusion:It's a pretty fun game, but only if you have time to waste, or people to play with. The story mode is too steril, and... professional. Maybe that's why this is one of the two best racing sims on the market right now. The other's Diddy Kong Racing, duh.The "story" represents the steril, boring world of racing for 60 years quite good. And that's why i give this game the rating of: 5/10And the Completionist rating of: Try It!----------------------------------Completionist-O-Meter------------------------------------- ˇ Complete it! Play it! Try it! Rage it! Kick it! Burn it! Send it to JoWood! ^ -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Cast:   (P.S.: These are just temporary.) |
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ati "The Hero"
Owen Hart
Administrator/RWF Graphics Designer
Please write ati with all low letters.
Posts: 683
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Post by ati "The Hero" on Oct 21, 2014 20:57:20 GMT
Hey! Look who's here! ..I missed ya', mate. I know that you didn't, Jack. Mainly because you were with me... ..all the freaking time... I wasn't talking to you. I'm was talking to the reader.Oh, well... Welcome to my biggest review, so far. Today, i will be reviewing the Desmond saga of Assassin's Creed.(Not counting the first one. I'll still have to play that, but i'll do that too.) So, because i'm a big Ezio mark, and for numerous other reasons, i will start with a rants. Now, this big review, will be a short one. ..And by short one, i mean that i will have nearly everything in spoiler tags so you can view the parts you want without having to scroll through 20 pages of text. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- The rant about the way the franchise is going: ..Look, i get it. They can't continue with Ezio forever. Heck, as much as i love Ezio, i don't really care about him not being in anymore. Why? Because, while i may be a big mark, i know that they need to have new characters to gain new costumers, and to do that, they can't use the same shit over and over and over.
BUT, if they are going to make new characters, make ones that don't totally suck.
Or at least, do the same shit with Ezio, give them three days, and make them a character people can somewhat relate to, so they will not hate them after the first playthrough.
Now, i don't know if i'm in the majority, or the minority, but i didn't like Connor. Connor was a pretty boring character. Why? Because he is/was the 'Murrican Ezio. 3 was nearly the same game as 2 was, but with a "new" character and a new setting. Their story is the same. Let's take a look at both of their stories:
Ezio:
AC2: Ezio's family gets killed, so he wants to get revenge on the Borgia family. The family who killed his family.
ACB: Now, Ezio returns a bit wiser. He's still after the Borgia, but now he sees that he (somehow) needs to pull the brotherhood together, before it breaks.
ACR: Now Ezio returns as Il Mentore (The Mentor), and goes off to Costantinopoli (Constantinopoli..Ah, let's just call it by it's name. Istambul.) where he gets new equipment, new friends, and finally finds love.
Connor:
AC3: Connor's mother, and people gets killed, so he wants to get revenge on Charles Lee, the man who killed his mom and his people.
..Yeah, totally not the same story as AC2...
Anyways, see what i mean? So, if you can't think of a new story, at least add a little spice to it. And make the character a bit more...
..i don't know...
...more interesting. Because, to be honest, i had to buy Ezio's clothing off of Uplay to enjoy the game. Andyou don't know how much i want this to be a joke. But i guess this shows how the character can make or break the game. And for me, Connor broke it.
..Then came Black Flag....
*sigh* I don't care about how you can parkour from ship to ship, and how Edward Kenway fits into the series, and all that shit. Any why? Because:
A:I hate fighting with boats. Is it realisitc? Yes. But is it fun? Not for me.
And B: If i remember correctly, from the time when i watched the total amount of 1 video of 1 playthrough, when i was interested in it, he becomes and Assassin, by killing another, and putting on the clothes...
...BY THIS LOGIC, I COULD GO TO A STORE WHERE THEY SELL REPLICA ASSASSIN CLOTHES, KILL THE SHOPKEEPER, AND GO OFF TO BE AN ASSASSIN BEFORE THEY CATCH ME AND PUT ME IN AN ASYLUM!
...And then comes Unity, and Rogue. Now, i'll only talk about Rogue, because i still have some faith left in Unity.
So, when the carbon Captian Jack Sparrow failed, what do they do? Go back to the other failed project we call AC3, flip it a bit, give us a Templar as the protagonist, and basically shit on the series, by releasing a game called Assassin's Creed Rogue, when it's clearly Templar's Creed.
I just can't decide if i want to pay for 4 and Rogue, so i can see if i was right or wrong, or just ignore them for 40 years, the time it will take me to buy a new gen console.
For me, this is just mind boiling...
So, on with the reviews: Assassin's Creed 2 You get a new assassin! And you get a new assassin! Everyone gets a new assassin!-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Story:I will not spoil the games' stories more than i already did in the rant. So, let's go to the ratings! +I liked the story. I could see why Ezio would do what he does, and well... i found him a meh character. -What i didn't like though, is that we didn't really had a look into Ezio's life 5/10-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Gameplay:+I liked the gameplay. -I didn't like that you can't call the horse +Other than that, the controls takes a few minutes than to get used to. Which i count as good, because i've found games that's controls are a bit.. hard to learn. +Oh, also, i didn't experience the game slowing down. You'll see why i say this. 7.5/10-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Visuals:I liked it. It's not the best, but really, it looks better than Unturned. +I like the visuals -But they can still use some work 5/10-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Sounds:-I didn't like the music, on the most part. +I liked one song, and i only liked that one because it sounded like the AVGN's theme. +The sound effects are good though 7/10-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- The Struggle:It's good for me. I never felt like it's too easy, or too difficult. 10/10-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- And Now:  : This game is glitchy. One time, jumped into the water, fell into the void, then ended up back in the water. And the other time, i was on a ledge, i couldn't move, so i decided to jump down, and i somehow ended up in the void once again. Then it decided that i died, and respawned me. But still, you shouldn't get stuck in nothing, when you're climbing on a ledge.-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Completion Bonus:(The Completion bonus is pretty good, if you ask us. It's access to the whole map. Now, it may not seem like much, but it's good, going to places you couldn't visit before. And going to places, to collect shit so you can complete the game 100%.) -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Conclusion:It's a pretty good game, and if you want to experience... most.. of Ezio's life, you should pick this up, with the Ezio trilogy. It's not the best one, but this is how he started, and that's... well... backstory. I guess. Anyways, i give this game the rating of: 7.1/10And the Completionist rating of: Play it!----------------------------------Completionist-O-Meter------------------------------------- ˇ Complete it! Play it! Try it! Rage it! Kick it! Burn it! Send it to JoWood! ^ -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Assassin's Creed: Brotherhood Ezio's last adventure. To us, at least.-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Story:Again, no spoilers. +I like the story, once again. Actually, this would've been a good end to Ezio's journey. And i can't honestly think of a better story. 10/10-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Gameplay:+They added a call horse option. -It's pretty much the same though +But somehow they made it a bit more enjoyable 7/10-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Sounds:-Again with the screaming music -And now, i didn't even find a music i liked +The effects are stil good though 3/10-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Visuals:This is what i'm talking about! Well, it looks good enough for me. +The graphics look good, in my opinion -Though, i'd like to see an HD remake of this game, on new and last gen... and i would pay for it... again... 5/10-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- The Struggle:Again, the difficuty is for me. It's perfect. But this is subjective... ...Then again, not like every game review is subjective10/10-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- And now: : I didn't find any bugs, or glitches.-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Completionist Bonus:The same as in AC2 -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Conclusion:I liked the game. In fact, in my opinion, it's the best in the series. It gave me everything i wanted, and even more. And that's why i give this game the rating of: 8.5/10And the Completionist rating of: Complete It!----------------------------------Completionist-O-Meter------------------------------------- ˇ Complete it! Play it! Try it! Rage it! Kick it! Burn it! Send it to JoWood! ^ -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Assassin's Creed: Revelations Why would you do this? Why?-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Story:Do i need to say this one? -I'm sad to say this, but the story is boring. The only thing it has going on for itself is Ezio falling in love. 0/10-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Gameplay:-They removed the horse altogether +The new hookblade is cool, when climbing -but it sucks when you do anything else 3/10-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Sounds:-I don't like the music -I don't like the music that plays when you battle +Still good sound effects 3/10-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Visuals:+It looks slightly better -I should've wrote slightly in all caps, because that's how little the change is 5/10-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- The Struggle:The only thing this game has going for it, is the difficulty. And that's still.. 10/10-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- And Now: : Again, no bugs.-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Completionist bonus:The same thing you get in AC2 and ACB -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Conclusion:It's really, really not that good. I don't regret buying it, but i regret that i had to send Ezio off with this. Te ha fatto cosa potuto, "Il Mentore". Ora, Ezio Auditore da Firenze, requiescat in pace. (You did what you could, "The Mentor". Now, Ezio Auditore da Firenze, rest in piece) Aaanyways, we give this game the rating of 4/10, and the Completionist bonus of: Try it!----------------------------------Completionist-O-Meter------------------------------------- ˇ Complete it! Play it! Try it! Rage it! Kick it! Burn it! Send it to JoWood! ^ -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Assassin's Creed 3 I miss ACB Ezio so much...-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Story:No spoilers. -They recycled AC2, basically 0/10-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Gameplay:-They changed up the controls. Why fix something that isn't broken? They weren't hard to learn at all.. -You have to get out a bloody whistle to call the horse.... 0/10-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Sounds:-I still don't like the music. Why is it that they can't make at least one song i like? -Not even the sailor songs. I can't honestly say that i like those either. +The sound effects are still good 3/10-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Visuals:This is the only thing the game has going for it. It looks good. 7/10-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- The Struggle:The AI is stupider. If that's even a wordI was tailing a few soldiers. ..Not really, tailing, to be more exact, i was standing in the middle of a pack of soldiers, AND THEY DIDN'T EVEN NOTICE ME! So yeah, this is easier. 4/10-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- And now: : I did not find any glitches.-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Completionist Bonus:Again, the Comepletionist bonus is the same as in the others. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Conlcusion:I, personally, didn't like the game. But i can see why others could enjoy it.. Anyways, i give this game the rating of: 4.5/10And the Completionist rating of: Burn It!----------------------------------Completionist-O-Meter------------------------------------- ˇ Complete it! Play it! Try it! Rage it! Kick it! Burn it! Send it to JoWood! ^ -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- cast:   |
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ati "The Hero"
Owen Hart
Administrator/RWF Graphics Designer
Please write ati with all low letters.
Posts: 683
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Post by ati "The Hero" on Oct 21, 2014 20:58:08 GMT
Also, it seems like the Completionist-O-Meter is broken..
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ati "The Hero"
Owen Hart
Administrator/RWF Graphics Designer
Please write ati with all low letters.
Posts: 683
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Post by ati "The Hero" on Nov 29, 2014 16:12:56 GMT
Hey everyone! I'm back! And this time, i will not use any gimmicks.
So, what you will read, is what i think of these games. And why did i say "These"?
I said "These" because i will review three games.
To close off the Assassin's Creed series (for now), i will review the first and the last (so far) in the series. (Also, the last being AC4:BF. I don't plan on playing Templar's Creed anytime soon.)
"What's the third game", you may ask. Well, because i review games that in some shape or form include Assassin's Creed, i will review Soul Calibur 5. (B'cuz, y'know, it has Ezio in it.)
So, with that being done, let's start with Assassin's Creed (1)
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Story:
You are Altair (means "Eagle") who is a born assassin. (Quite literally.)
That's the guy's backstory. Now, i'll try not to spoil anything, but still give my two cents here.
While i "respect" what Altair has done (you know... he kind of started one of my favorite franchises, or something like that) I didn't like his character. He felt like he was Aluminum's (That's how i called Al Mualim, his mentor) lap dog.
He just felt like a mindless drone, which wouldn't bug me, if he wouldn't be the main character.
But, he may just need some work done (have a few more games) so we could see more of him.
Wait, what? He has more games? One on the DS and one on the PSP? Oh, yeah, i played the mobile port of the DS version. It didn't help. At all.
-The story is boring, on Altair's part. It made me feel bad about the scores i gave to Connor...
-Desmond doesn't get enough screen time, and that doesn't help. Though, i "hate" the guy, so hat do i know?
0/10 (Note: I can see the hate rain coming...)
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Gameplay:
The controls aren't really different then the Ezio trilogy's. But man, oh man, is that "little" thing that's different bugging me.
Look, in Ezio's games, i know exactly on which frame to press the X/[] button. So, now tell me, how in the blue hell do i "miss" that frame in the first game, on the same animations, when i press the X/[] on the same, exact frame?
whew, fanboy rage over.
-Sometimes the buttons doesn't respond.
+Again, easy to learn controls.
5/10
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Difficulty:
For me, the difficulty came from my inability to block attack. (Counter kill to be more exact, but that's how i block.)
If i would've been able to block, it would1ve been easy.
-Cheap difficulty
0/10
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Sounds:
+The sound effects are good
-I didn't like the songs, though
5/10
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Visuals:
The game doesn't look bad. It looks good, even. For a game that was released in 2007, it looks pretty good.
+The visuals aren't bad, at all.
10/10
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Completionist Bonus:
You get to kill civilians without losing life. That's all.
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Glitches:
I didn't find any.
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Conclusion:
I didn't like the game, after all. I "respect" what it started, and i really tried to like it, but i couldn't.
I hope that all of you can understand, that i foumd the game saltless. So, i give this game the score of: 3/10
And the Completionist rating of: Burn It!
----------------------------------Completionist-O-Meter-------------------------------------
ˇ
Complete it! Play it! Try it! Rage it! Kick it! Burn it! Send it to JoWood!
^
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Assassin's Creed IV: Black Flag
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Story:
You're playing as "Privateer" Edward Kenway. (Haytham's dad, Connor's grandfather) As he's trying get rich. I'll try not to spoil anything.
And in 2012(/13?) you are, well, you. With.... *blank*'s death, (sorry, this is the best way i could think of telling this without spoiling the ending of AC3) they needed someone to go forward. This is the most i can tell without spoiling anything.
+The story is meh in the start, but it gets better
-The ending doesn1t make sense, when we look at the Completionist bonus.
5/10
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Gameplay:
The controls got chaged a little. But only the ship controls.
+The ship controls are better
+The on foot controls are the same
-You can't target only one guy, but we'll come back to it in a second
-The built in "targeting" system is bad. And it was there before too. But with the "Mainly target the highlighted guy" option is now removed, which is bad because sometimes it freaks out. E.g.:I break the defense of a big guy (who you can only attack after breaikng his defense) and then Edward hits the other guy because of the highlight targeting system. *sarcasm* Because i really wanted to hit the 10 other guys around the guy whose defense i broke before hitting him.
5/10
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Difficulty:
The difficulty comes from the targeting system. Well, most of it.
+Just as difficult as AC3
-But add cheap difficulty
5/10
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Sounds:
+The sound effects are still good
-The sailor songs can get really annoying
5/10
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Visuals:
The game looks just like AC3. I will not bash on this, because i'm pretty sure that with AC3, they1ve pushed the hardware limits, and that's why it looks like AC3.
+The game is good looking
10/10
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Completionist Bonus:
You can free roam. And there's a lot of things to do after you've done with the story, if you are like me.
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Glitches:
I've found a handful of glitches, but i'll only tell you the funniest one.
Once, i was running towards a tree, and Edward started swimming in the air, while he was stuck to the tree. Too bad you can't see it.
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Conclusion:
I liked the game. It was better than what i expected. I enjoyed it, but i can't say that it lived up to the hype, and that's why i give it the score of: 5.5/10
And the Completionist rating of: Try It!
----------------------------------Completionist-O-Meter-------------------------------------
ˇ
Complete it! Play it! Try it! Rage it! Kick it! Burn it! Send it to JoWood!
^
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Soul Calibur V
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Story:
The two main characters are Patroklos and Pyrrha, the kids of Sophitia (i think.)
Because i don't want to spoil anything, that's al i'll say. And that i didn't like the story.
-Patroklos is bad
+Pyrrha is okay
-I didn't like the story
3/10
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Gameplay:
The gameplay remains the same, but with "Final Edges" added. Or well, they were new for me. (The last SC game i played is 3)
You can perform a Final Edge by hitting the button combination of quarter circle-quarter circle + LT/L2
You don't want to know how much time it took me to figure something this simple out.
+The gameplay is good, easy to learn controls, and everyone has a personality
10/10
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Difficulty:
The difficulty can be set. And most difficulty options are fair.
...Then you turn the difficulty up to "Very Hard" and the CPU becomes "Spam-bot 2014"
+The difficulty can be set, and most of these options are fair
-"Very Hard" needs to be renamed to "Cheap"
5/10
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Sounds:
+The sound effects are good
+The music is good
10/10
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Visuals:
+The game is pretty
-Though, they couldn't get Ezio's face right. He looks like he's on something.
5/10
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Completionist Bonus:
None.
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Glitches:
I didn't find any.
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Roster:
There are newcomers, and veterans in this game. To name some of the roster, some of the newcomers are: Xiba, Patroklos, Pyrrha, and Edge Master (Mokujin).
And to name some of the veterans: Ivy, Mitsurugi, Yoshimitsu, Raphael, Astaroth, Cervantes, Maxi, Kilik (Mokujin), and Dampierre (If you buy him.)
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Conclusion:
The game isn't all that bad. Yeah, it's sad to lose our beloved Seong Mi-Nas and Yung Sheongs, but they come back as other characters. If not now, then later.
After all, i liked the game, and that's why i give this game the rating of: 5/10
And the Completionist rating of: Try It!
----------------------------------Completionist-O-Meter-------------------------------------
ˇ
Complete it! Play it! Try it! Rage it! Kick it! Burn it! Send it to JoWood!
^
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ati "The Hero"
Owen Hart
Administrator/RWF Graphics Designer
Please write ati with all low letters.
Posts: 683
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Post by ati "The Hero" on Dec 19, 2014 13:45:55 GMT
Hey, everyone, it's that time again when ati finishes a game and decides to make a fool of himself.
Anyways... i just finished Hitman: Absolution, and for people who only read the intruduction and the score, the game is bad.
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Story:
So, now that i pissed of any and all Hitman fans, we can continue with the review. (though, i'm pretty sure that this game was recieved negatively.)
So, as i do most of the time, i will only spoil the first few missions/first few hours of story.
Your are Agent 47, the Wolverine of hitmans, who was (technically) raised in a test tube, to be the perfect killer.
Yeah, when i said no spoilers, i really meant it. I will not tell you about this game's story.
And this is why everyone hates me, lol.
Pros:
-It has a good flow, and is told pretty good
Cons:
-Though if you're like me, you'll most likely skip the cutscenes
5/10
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Gameplay:
Honestly? The gameplay isn't all that bad. The controls are easy to learn, and i only had the "What the hell does this do again" effect a couple of times.
Pros:
-The controls are easy to learn
Cons:
-The controls are easy to forget
5/10
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Difficulty:
It's adjustable. I played through this torture of a game on easy, because i didn't want to die to guards who have Eagle Vision imported right from Assassin's Creed IV: Black Flag!
Seriously, i get that if you don't get too close they will not spot you, but tell me how to get past 3 guards
guarding a door where i need to go without waiting. And oh, yes, i am impatient and don't want to wait in a waiting game, well sorry because i wanted to start writing this in this freaking century! I started my playthrough nearly a year ago!
Aaanyways, ratings.
Pros:
-Adjustable difficulty (which is pretty much a standard now, but whatevs.)
Cons:
-The difficulty comes from having 100000 guards in a room. I want challenge, not frustration because copy-paste guard #251 doesn't want to move three steps away until he retires. (And if i would really be an asshole, i would count this one con as two cons.)
5/10
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Sounds:
I gotta give credit where it'S due, so, the music isn't that bad during gameplay. Though, i don't really like classic music, i will not bash on it, because, to each their own.
Pros:
-You'll probably find something you don't totally hate.
Cons:
-though, if you are me, you'll probably won't hear any of it because you'll be hearing shooting for the next 10-15 minutes.
5/10
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Visuals:
Again, I gotta give credit. The visuals aren't bad either.
Pros:
-The visuals are pretty good looking
Cons:
-Though, looking at today's standards, one could say that they look just up to standards.
5/10
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Conclusion:
For me, the game was boring. And just for the record, i played it lke it was an action movie.
Yeah, you may like the slow pace of going through every 10 times before doing it, but for me, it felt a bit saltless. I liked what Agent 47 could do, i liked Agent 47 as a character, i liked the controls and the mechanisms, but all of it was for nothing when they couldn't give me enough... well.. movement. It felt like i was playing on a set on a stage, or something. And when i made "movement" for myself, i was punished. And that is why i give this game the score of 5/10.
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SRI
Abdullah The Butcher
Administrator/RWF Creative/RWF Writer
Avatar and sig credit to BaneTheDestroyer
Posts: 408
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Post by SRI on Dec 19, 2014 14:39:07 GMT
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